so ulysses really isn't as hard as everyone says.
unless you're trying to read it in two weeks.
so the plan is now this: read 50 pages a day until i finish it (read: i will finish it ON the day of my last tute), while writing a paper simultaneously. this doesn't sound impossible. we'll see.
one of my (only) british friends finishes exams tomorrow, we're supposed to help him celebrate by pouring champagne on him. fat chance. but i WILL help him get drunk tomorrow night.
i'm thinking mint-vodka-lemonades for my stop on the room to room.
also, seriously, it's going to be chiller than last time. less alcohol = healthier me.
Thursday, May 29
Tuesday, May 27
Monday, May 26
GONG
So some background before I start this epic tale: a few weeks ago, Brady and Jon engaged in a "slap-bet" which resulted in Jon getting the crap slapped out of him. Brady (for whatever reason) wouldn't share the substance of the bet aside from a few vagueries (no that's not a word).
Fast forward in time to last night.
Zach, his girlfriend Olga, Brady, Nicko, and I were at Noodle Bar, gearing up for some delicious noodles for dinner. Olga and Zach were along one side of the table, and Brady, Nicko, and I were on the other. Not immediately, but eventually and inexorably, Nicko starts hitting on the waitress. Brady gives Nicko some guff about how he also thinks the waitress is cute, and seems prepared to fight for her, but eventually backs off. We crack jokes about how Nicko should give her his number and tell her it'll only work for one more day (as I write this, he's flying home).
During her check-up on us, Nicko asks the waitress about the gong on the counter by the cash register, and she tells us that when they get a five pound tip (which is rare), someone gets to ring the gong. No further substantial flirting happens, but after the meal, Nicko asks the waitress about the Chili side dish on the menu. She enthuses that it is just cut up chili. Nicko then inquires about desert, to which the waitress replies there is none. Brady starts muttering about what an idiot Nicko is and he'll show Nicko up once we leave the restaurant, which we are all super confused about.
We end up leaving a five pound tip and Nicko rings the gong as we walk out. Immediately after we leave the restaurant, Brady drops a bomb: the slap-bet had been over whether Brady could exchange numbers with this very waitress (Brady was successful, so he got to slap Jon). We all shriek with delightful, belated awkwardness, and are still shrieking when I realize I've left my scarf at our table. As we walk back to the restaurant, Nicko gets the waitress' phone number with Brady with designs to awkwardly text-message her.
Everyone else refuses to walk into the restaurant with me. I retrieve my scarf and ask the manageress where our waitress is. She responds that she's gone to the bathroom, and I tell her to tell our waitress that my friend is sorry for acting like an ass - he just thought she was cute. She agrees to pass the message on.
As I walk out the door, Nicko's phone starts ringing. He picks up, only to be answered by a man demanding to know who he is. Nicko immediately hangs up and we realize this must be the waitress' pissed off boyfriend. We cackle all the way to the pub, have a few drinks and call it a night.
THE END
JUST KIDDING IT'S TOTALLY NOT.
Nicko texted the waitress (who is now in his phonebook as 'Gong Ho,' get it?) the following: "C U in mah dreams, Noodlegirl. GONG." He didn't get a response, but the number started calling him back. He ignored it.
I got a text message from Nicko a few hours before he got on his plane, saying "I just got the most angry voice message I have ever received. it was from the "gong ho" guy. he was yelling in an accent, "i dont know who are but dont fucking message me anymore!" my timing to leave is perfect."
Curiouser and curiouser.
I pass this message along to Brady, who responds more hilariously than I could ever impart, so here's the chat transcript:
Daisy: nicko just texted me
Brady: and
Daisy: "i just got the most angry voice message I have ever received. it was from the "gong ho" guy. he was yelling in an accent, "i dont know who are but dont fucking message me anymore!" my timing to leave is perfect."
Brady: HAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAH
Daisy: did you give him someone elses number?
Brady: YES
Daisy: HAHHAAHHAHAAH
Brady: DOMINOS PIZZA DELIVERY GUY
Brady: hahahaahahahahah
Brady: masterful
Brady: god that played out like a fucking charm
Daisy: oh my GOD
I, for one, hope Nicko sees this story here first, as he's on a plane and I can't tell him for another five hours. I only wish I could see his face when he reads it.
Oh and just so you all know this isn't malevolent: Nicko LOVES Brady, and vice versa. If they were gay and lived in California, they'd be sorting out their gift registry at some video game store as we speak.
Fast forward in time to last night.
Zach, his girlfriend Olga, Brady, Nicko, and I were at Noodle Bar, gearing up for some delicious noodles for dinner. Olga and Zach were along one side of the table, and Brady, Nicko, and I were on the other. Not immediately, but eventually and inexorably, Nicko starts hitting on the waitress. Brady gives Nicko some guff about how he also thinks the waitress is cute, and seems prepared to fight for her, but eventually backs off. We crack jokes about how Nicko should give her his number and tell her it'll only work for one more day (as I write this, he's flying home).
During her check-up on us, Nicko asks the waitress about the gong on the counter by the cash register, and she tells us that when they get a five pound tip (which is rare), someone gets to ring the gong. No further substantial flirting happens, but after the meal, Nicko asks the waitress about the Chili side dish on the menu. She enthuses that it is just cut up chili. Nicko then inquires about desert, to which the waitress replies there is none. Brady starts muttering about what an idiot Nicko is and he'll show Nicko up once we leave the restaurant, which we are all super confused about.
We end up leaving a five pound tip and Nicko rings the gong as we walk out. Immediately after we leave the restaurant, Brady drops a bomb: the slap-bet had been over whether Brady could exchange numbers with this very waitress (Brady was successful, so he got to slap Jon). We all shriek with delightful, belated awkwardness, and are still shrieking when I realize I've left my scarf at our table. As we walk back to the restaurant, Nicko gets the waitress' phone number with Brady with designs to awkwardly text-message her.
Everyone else refuses to walk into the restaurant with me. I retrieve my scarf and ask the manageress where our waitress is. She responds that she's gone to the bathroom, and I tell her to tell our waitress that my friend is sorry for acting like an ass - he just thought she was cute. She agrees to pass the message on.
As I walk out the door, Nicko's phone starts ringing. He picks up, only to be answered by a man demanding to know who he is. Nicko immediately hangs up and we realize this must be the waitress' pissed off boyfriend. We cackle all the way to the pub, have a few drinks and call it a night.
THE END
JUST KIDDING IT'S TOTALLY NOT.
Nicko texted the waitress (who is now in his phonebook as 'Gong Ho,' get it?) the following: "C U in mah dreams, Noodlegirl. GONG." He didn't get a response, but the number started calling him back. He ignored it.
I got a text message from Nicko a few hours before he got on his plane, saying "I just got the most angry voice message I have ever received. it was from the "gong ho" guy. he was yelling in an accent, "i dont know who are but dont fucking message me anymore!" my timing to leave is perfect."
Curiouser and curiouser.
I pass this message along to Brady, who responds more hilariously than I could ever impart, so here's the chat transcript:
Daisy: nicko just texted me
Brady: and
Daisy: "i just got the most angry voice message I have ever received. it was from the "gong ho" guy. he was yelling in an accent, "i dont know who are but dont fucking message me anymore!" my timing to leave is perfect."
Brady: HAHAHAAHAHAHAAHAHAAHAH
Daisy: did you give him someone elses number?
Brady: YES
Daisy: HAHHAAHHAHAAH
Brady: DOMINOS PIZZA DELIVERY GUY
Brady: hahahaahahahahah
Brady: masterful
Brady: god that played out like a fucking charm
Daisy: oh my GOD
I, for one, hope Nicko sees this story here first, as he's on a plane and I can't tell him for another five hours. I only wish I could see his face when he reads it.
Oh and just so you all know this isn't malevolent: Nicko LOVES Brady, and vice versa. If they were gay and lived in California, they'd be sorting out their gift registry at some video game store as we speak.
A poem from a sunny place on a rainy day
by Craig Raine
(from "A Journey to Greece")
III. Sleepies
In Athens we see the ruins -
columns of corduroy, weatherworn
lions vague as Thurber dogs.
The baby sleeps, slumped
like a bean bag in her chair.
She's caught the sun.
More ferocious, leonine yawns,
more pillars sleeping it off
or standing tipsily...
More on my fun weekend with Nicko later...
(from "A Journey to Greece")
III. Sleepies
In Athens we see the ruins -
columns of corduroy, weatherworn
lions vague as Thurber dogs.
The baby sleeps, slumped
like a bean bag in her chair.
She's caught the sun.
More ferocious, leonine yawns,
more pillars sleeping it off
or standing tipsily...
More on my fun weekend with Nicko later...
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